


The Genin Gaffe

by ohayohimawari



Series: The Kumade Toriichi Arc [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Continuing Saga Of Kumade Toriichi, Crack, Drabble, Funny, Gen, Humor, Kakashi And His Copycat, Silly, This is ridiculous, and I hope you enjoy it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-06-09
Packaged: 2020-04-23 18:08:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19156219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohayohimawari/pseuds/ohayohimawari
Summary: Hiruzen Sarutobi assigned a mission to Kumade Toriichi erroneously, and he enlists Minato's help to cover his mistake before there are long-lasting consequences to Kakashi Hatake's reputation.





	The Genin Gaffe

**Author's Note:**

> I offer no excuse nor apology for this ridiculous crack drabble. I've spent most of my life surrounded by boys in my immediate and extended family, so, it was inevitable that fart humor would make its way into my fanfiction.
> 
> This follows another story I've written about Kakashi and Kumade, titled, "The Copy Ninja." I hope you will simply enjoy this as the silly piece of fanfiction that it is.
> 
> I love to hear from my readers, and I hope you will tell me if this has made you laugh.
> 
> I do not own these characters; I've had a wonderful time exploring them.
> 
> If you are unfamiliar with who Kumade Toriichi is, please check this [link](https://naruto.fandom.com/wiki/Kumade_Toriichi) to learn more about him

“You have a mission for me, Lord Third?” Minato Namikaze raised his head to regard the leader of the Hidden Leaf from where he knelt in the Hokage’s office.

“Yes,” Hiruzen Sarutobi exhaled the word absentmindedly within a cloud of pipe smoke without looking up from the scroll he was reading.

Minato maintained his reverent position and waited patiently as Lord Third finished scanning the message. Hiruzen signaled his completion of the letter with a thoughtful hum before he rolled the scroll up again and set it aside on his desk. The slight creases around his eyes became more pronounced when he issued a small, but warm smile to Konoha’s Yellow Flash.

“Minato,” he said the jōnin’s name softly and slowly. “Do you know Kakashi Hatake?”

“I’ve heard of him, certainly,” Minato said as he stood up. “He’s the son of the White Fang, correct? Other shinobi in the village have called him a prodigy, having graduated to genin after only one year at Konoha’s Ninja Academy.”

“Hmm,” Lord Third confirmed Minato’s information with a nod. “Kakashi has displayed exceptional skill and intelligence for one so young. However, I’ve been unable to find a permanent place for him on a team, even though he was quite popular among his classmates.” Hiruzen tapped the ashes out of his pipe into a glass dish before setting it down.

Minato paused for a moment to consider his response. “I have also heard that Hatake is difficult to work with,” he admitted. “Kakashi’s rigid adherence to the Shinobi Rules and determination to successfully complete missions regardless of the cost to his teammates has prevented others from wanting to join up with him.” Minato’s bright blue eyes met Hiruzen’s fixed gaze. “I assumed his behavior was a result of the circumstances surrounding Sakumo’s death. I can imagine the passing of his father has cast a long shadow onto Kakashi’s life.”

“Yes,” Lord Third emphatically agreed. “And it’s only one of the many problems his son is left to resolve on his own.”

“Oh?” Minato’s curiosity and furrowed brow displayed his genuine concern for Kakashi.

The younger man’s reaction was precisely what Hiruzen had hoped for, and he lowered his voice to emphasize that his next words were to be held in the strictest confidence. “As I said, Kakashi was popular among his classmates. Another student, Kumade Toriichi, seems to have modeled himself after Kakashi; though he hasn’t been successful at emulating him.” Lord Third ran a hand down his tired face.

“Kumade?” Minato cast a quizzical look to his Hokage.

“Toriichi,” Hiruzen repeated. “He struggled at school, and because Kakashi excelled in nearly every way, Kumade began to mimic him; in appearance especially.”

Lord Third pinched the front of his official headgear between two fingers and brought the hat down to hide his expression. “It has led me to assign a mission to Kumade erroneously. I’m afraid this has made things even more difficult for Kakashi.”

Minato’s blue eyes widened in shock that Konoha’s leader had made such a mistake, but he was quick to wipe the evidence of his surprise from his face. “The two must bear a striking resemblance, Lord Third.”

“Indeed,” Hiruzen lifted his hat a little, revealing the embarrassed flush that remained on his cheeks. “But that’s not the worst of it. It seems that Kumade has digestive issues.”

“Why would that matter?” Minato puzzled.

“Flatulence compromises even the best shinobi, Minato. Kumade is about as stealthy as Maito’s son. However, whereas Gai will learn the necessary skills to hide himself completely, Toriichi’s condition will plague him throughout his shinobi career. He may never rank higher than chūnin because of it unless perhaps, he can learn to harness it to his advantage.” Hiruzen removed his Hokage’s headpiece and ran one hand through his thinning hair.

Minato silently reassessed his dream to become Hokage, when introduced to a challenge he’d never considered. Outwardly he asked, “What does this have to do with Kakashi?”

“Kumade took advantage of the opportunity that my mistake granted him. He wants to be just like Kakashi, so he pretended to _be_ Kakashi instead of correcting me. His hair looked a little different, but I thought Kakashi had cut it because of the hot summer it’s been.” Hiruzen shook his head. “That doesn’t excuse my mistake and doesn’t change what followed.”

Minato waited in expectant silence as Lord Third cleared his throat and continued. “It was a surveillance mission. They were supposed to shadow a group of traveling merchants that had roused suspicion during their visit to Konoha. From the little intel the team gathered, these merchants may very well have been spies from Iwa.”

Hiruzen sat back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest. “I assigned Shikaku Nara to lead this team, and according to his report, they managed to follow the others for several hours undetected until Kumade literally blew their cover.”

Minato’s mouth fell open, and he attempted to recover as quickly as possible, asking the first serious question that came to mind. “Wh-what made Shikaku suggest they were Iwa nin?”

“The targets encased themselves within an air-tight mud dome, which is an impenetrable protective jutsu that Iwa nin are known to employ. It’s their toughest defense, so it must have been awful. Unfortunately, the mishap incapacitated Shikaku’s team as well, and by the time they recovered, the so-called merchants had escaped underground without a trace.” Hiruzen leaned forward, propping himself up by his elbows on his desk as a grim expression overtook his face.

“My mission then is to try to confirm the identity of the escaped targets?” Minato wasn’t distracted by the odd details of Shikaku’s failed mission and quickly cut to the seriousness of the situation.

“No, I have a different mission for you. One that will remain off the books, and which may test even your patience, Minato.”

Minato respected the secrecy of this upcoming mission and stood silent, waiting for the details of his assignment.

“Word of this episode has spread throughout the shinobi of this village, as one would expect of gossip,” Hiruzen began to explain the sensitive situation to the Yellow Flash. “As you know, Kakashi’s cold demeanor hasn’t endeared him to his comrades. I have received several scrolls from Konoha ninjas respectfully requesting never to be assigned to work with the, uh, _Gassy Genin_ , as they now refer to him.” Lord Third lifted the scroll off of his desk and offered it to Minato.

Minato accepted the scroll and was astonished by what he read. He inhaled sharply, “Does Kakashi know about this?”

“Not yet. I sent him to Suna to deliver a message to the Kazekage. Partly to report the suspicions of Iwa and partly to get Kakashi out of Konoha for a bit. I hoped that this whole mess would be forgotten, but it’s only grown worse. I expect young Hatake to return tomorrow morning.” Hiruzen sighed and looked up at Minato again. “Kakashi has enough problems without the foolish mistake of an old man adding to them.”

“How can _I_ help?” Minato returned the scroll to the Hokage’s desk.

“Team up with both Kakashi and Kumade tomorrow. Round up lost cats, help the elderly carry their groceries, or assist civilians with chores—whatever you can come up with to keep those two boys together and most importantly, _seen_ together. It’ll be easier to explain the mistaken identity that way and hopefully clear the air.”

Minato couldn’t help himself from chuckling at Hiruzen’s choice of words, and Lord Third soon followed him. “Please do this for me Minato. You’ll be compensated out of my pocket for a B-rank mission, because this may be just as difficult. Kakashi detests Kumade, and after seeing how far Kumade will go to mimic Kakashi, I can’t say that I blame him.”

Minato offered a half smile and a nod as acceptance of his mission, before bowing then turning to exit the Hokage’s office.

“Oh, and Minato, if it’s this hot tomorrow, take the boys for ice cream. It might help us determine if Kumade is simply lactose intolerant, which is easy enough to remedy. And should he drop offense where he goes, that’ll be all the proof we need to show the others that they too have mistaken this copycat ninja for Kakashi.”

** The End **

**Author's Note:**

> Join [The Kakashi Lounge Discord Server](https://discord.gg/fxyw3eB)   
> To be a member, you must be:  
> -at least 16 years old  
> -able to play nice with others in a multishipping community


End file.
